War Story
submitted by: Alva Leon Matheson
At the brief, I find out that I have a pre- fragged target. Cool. I am getting two B-4s (sorry Phantoms, I keep forgetting that they were “fighters”) with LGBs out of Ubon. Lead would have a LASER pod and dash two would have two MK-84 2,000 pound bombs. I would put them in on a road cut of route huma-humma, thereby destroying a major segment of the Ho Chi Minh Trail and WINNING the WAR!
I immediately envisioned the award ceremony – The President proudly and humbly presents this medal to...
Anyway, I mount my trusty Bronco and head for my sector. I pass over Tchepone at daybreak. Gunner Nguyen greets me with his complementary clip of 37 mm. I smile and wave. Just his way of saying, “S ‘appinin,’ Bro!”
I have my target plotted and fly right to it. Actually it wasn’t hard to find since it had been bombed about a zillion times already. In fact, I spot it about 50 miles out because the whole side of the mountain is bald. I fly over it and decide how I will put in this precision strike. I am ready.
The Ubon warriors check in. I start my strike brief and ask if they need a hold down.
“Nah,” the leader responds,” we are looking at it.”
“OK,” I coolly reply. “Where are you now?”
“Well FAC, we are climbing out of Ubon and just switched over from departure control.”
Being professional, I finish my brief.
The fighters arrive overhead. I give them the local details. Being professional, they acknowledge all.
“You guys ready to do it?”
“Sure,” lead replies.
“OK, I am in to mark,” I reply in my best John
Wayne voice.
Lead responds,”FAC, you don’t need to waste
a rocket.”
I was not to be deterred. After all, this was
MY strike. I rolled in and fired a rocket. Splash!
I pulled up and surveyed my work.
“OK, lead, put your bombs just down from
my smoke.” Pause............
“Actually FAC, we have a photo from the Intel guys and they want us to put the bombs about 500 meters to the south.”
Screwed. The Intel guys had screwed me. Now I know who the real enemy is. But I recover fast.“Good plan, I am to the northwest, you are cleared hot.”
Lead sets up his orbit and calls LASER on. Dash two rolls in from the west and drops both bombs. I watch them come off and fishtail their way to the target.
Some random 23 mm fire comes up but it is no threat.
Boom – Boom. The bombs slam into the side of the mountain and about a zillion tons of dirt slides down on the road. Nobody is going to pass that way for a while.
“Great hit!” I shout with perhaps just a little bit too much enthusiasm.
“Thanks,” the lead replies with an obviously tired tone. Then he adds, “We will be out here again tomorrow morning doing the same thing.” Hmmmmm.
So the fighters head home. But I am still on station with business to do. I start VRing my sector. About 30 minutes later though I decide to recheck my big strike. By now the dust has begun to clear and as I scan with my binoculars, I see gomers down there with shovels clearing the road.
Foul!
I can’t allow that so I roll in and fire several rockets at them. Splash, splash, splash. I pull up to see the results. One of the gomers is just standing there giving me two fingers.
Insult. What to do? Arc Light. I need an Arc Light. I call Hillsboro. The controller takes my “request.” I can tell though from his tone that he does not feel my outrage.
I hold off to the west and just watch hoping that Hillsboro will, at a minimum, divert to me at least one set of bombers (fighters) to answer this insult. But the Gods of war are not with me now and I am not favored. Rats!
So for the rest of my time on station I have to suffer the ignominy of watching those guys out there with shovels digging out that road, as I am impotent to prevent it. But my time on station ends and it is time to leave.
I pass over Tchepone again and “Jazz“ my throttles. Nguyen obligingly answers with another clip. What a guy.
So I am droning back to NKP and it is thinking time. I review it all and grudgingly realize that I have to admire those guys down there for their spunk. And I guess we did some good. We did destroy the road, at least for a while. Maybe an hour or so. But I had to admit to myself that probably soon, the trucks would be again passing through.
And later in my contemplative stage of life, I realized that on that mission, I learned two things:
1. Certain gestures are universal.
2. ‘Tis very hard to destroy a dirt road.
I am still waiting for my letter from the White House.